One of the sites visited was Rosewell ruins, reputed in its day to be one of the most elaborate homes in the American colonies. I remember seeing Rosewell as a child and climbing through brambles and brush to climb on the ruins. Today, the structure has been shored up and the brush cleared away. Archaeological studies are ongoing to unearth artifacts from the 1700's and later times.
After we did sightseeing, we had a chance to sit and talk for a long time. He came right out and told me that he was the adult child of an alcoholic. I had no idea that his dad drank heavily. He told me about his struggles with being a perfectionist and not feeling good enough. Amazing after all these years, he tells me about the difficulties he had with an alcoholic father. Once again I am reminded that there are so many of us affected by alcoholism.
I have taken many photos since I arrived. The reunion was a good time. The ones who were drunks in high school are still drunks. But they are getting a little worn around the edges after years of drinking. And 18 classmates have died from various causes including suicide. Some people actually looked better than I remember them. Several of the fellows I didn't recognize because they had no hair. Genetics and hard living definitely have a lot to do with how we age.
I really wish that C. could be here. I've talked to her many times each day, but it isn't the same as having her here. The animals definitely make it difficult for us to go on an extended vacation together. I don't really know what I'll do for the next few days. There are more sights to see as the area is historical. I've been to most all the places at one time or another in my life, but I didn't photograph them. So I'll have my camera and do as much photography as possible while I'm here.
Here are a few images from my hometown:
Syd I really appreciate these photographs -- a place so rich in history and I wish i knew more about it.
ReplyDeleteMy housemate and I have the same problem with going away and making sure someone reliable and caring is available to look after three dogs.
Mary, if you read about the Page family of Virginia you will find out more. The ruins are of Rosewell.
Deleteglad you had fun syd...its good to go back and see...its interesting how some change and others do not as well....have fun in my state while you are here...
ReplyDeleteWill do , Brian. Funny that it still feels like home in a nostalgic time warp kind of way.
DeleteBeautiful old buildings and the b&w shot of the dock on the water could be from anywhere that I grew up.
ReplyDeleteGlad you are remaking old connections, Syd. And isn't it strange how very little we knew about our friends' true lives, growing up? And they about ours? So many secrets.
Lots of secrets that we tried to hide as kids. Sadly, that continues for years until we decide not to hide anymore,
DeleteOH love love love the pictures and the history lesson! Your blogs give me brain fuel.
ReplyDeleteI notice myself how so many people from my high school stay the same. I have changed over the years but they seem stuck in their "party" habbits and can never seem to get away. It is like their mind and spirit are stuck in a time capsle yet their body continues to age.
Many of them still live in the same county where they were born. I think only three of us at the reunion came from "away ".
DeleteNow I'm wondering what a "guinea jubilee" is? And like Ms. Moon said, it is funny how when we were kids we never wondered what our friends were coping with.
ReplyDeleteWe were just busy coping with our own lives and accepting everyone at face value I think. I have had a few make amends with me in the last few years. There were bullies in school who later changed and I am glad to take their friendship now, or some of them anyway. Some will always be bullies.
Enjoy the rest of your vacation.
Guinea is a part of the county where the watermen lived. It was kind of a lawless area back in the day. Now the watermen celebrate their history and culture during the Guinea Jubilee.
DeleteI think Ms. Moon nailed it. When we were kids we didn't think about what our friends lives were like, did we? We just took them at face value because we were busy with our own problems.
ReplyDeleteI did wonder if others had problems. I could sense unhappiness with many I knew in school. But I had no clue about this friend, thinking he had the perfect family!
DeleteYou live in such a beautiful and historic place Syd. I think people probably sense a genuine kindness in you and feel safe talking to you. I'm glad your friend did.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing photos of your hometown. It looks like a beautiful place to grow up.
ReplyDeleteDefinitely a water kid growing up eh Syd? What # was this reunion. I went t my 30th a few years back and oddly enough I was the only one who looked the same.
ReplyDeleteSomehow I was thinking "guinea" had to do with guinea pigs. Haha.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, I was at my daughter's school open house last night and the words of this blog came floating back to my head. You know, it's still true. We go through life not knowing what is going on with our collegues. The person sitting next to you could have a sick spouse, or be in danger of losing their home because of debts, or whatever... and you might have no idea because face it, how often does anybody ask? How often do we know what questions need to be asked? If someone says "How are you?" and I say "I'm hanging" he/she never says "by a thread?" or whatever.. never get asked what is going on. Most times everyone is just still locked in their own little worlds and not paying attention to what is around them.
I'm glad you had a good time at the reunion.sad that C.could not have been there with you.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful buildings and scenery. Interesting that your friend opened up to you after so many years.
ReplyDeleteSometimes I think the transparency we learn in Al-Anon helps others feel safe in our presence. And I sometimes think we are drawn to our friends (and spouses) because of our mutual dysfunction. Your photos are always so beautiful that I want to go visit the places in the pictures. And it's so encouraging when you speak lovingly of C, helping us see that there is such hope for the alcoholics and addicts in our lives to recover. Thanks, as always, for sharing.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing the photos. Your story regarding your friend made me think back to my childhood friends. Most of their parents were heavy drinkers one of them died of alcoholism. The disease reaches into alot of areas of my life.
ReplyDeleteThe Rosewell ruins are fascinating ! One of our AA members with long standing sobriety taught me to open up about my alcoholism because he said about every third person you meet has alcohol problems somewhere in their family.
ReplyDelete