In the midst of it, I escape to the barn and to ride my horse. He is adjusting well, and his closeness and nuzzling of my hair and chest fill me with love. It is a simple uncomplicated love here. Not much asked of each other except respect and good manners.
I hear at meetings the sadness of those who are struggling with family and the expectations of Christmas. It is another day, albeit one that has lost meaning in its commercialization. For me, every day needs to be about caring and kindness, compassion and empathy. Not just one day. Every day.
I am at a loss to understand the amount of dysfunction in the world. I cannot change the hearts of madmen and murderers. I watch the garden growing and see the dogs playing. I hug and hold my beloved close at night. I go to the boat to have a night alone and listen to the waves slap the hull. And I whisper to my horse and feed him carrots, knowing that I will be with him to the end.
My thoughts are with those who are sick and suffering today. I wish that I could touch you and hold you and whisper that all will be okay. And that what isn't okay today may be righted for you tomorrow. I hope so, and send that thought out to the universe and a world in chaos. Not just one day, but every day I wish you peace.
Everyone dies. I died. Someone let the air out of my balloon. I'm free. Don't focus on the left over carcass of a deflated balloon. Open up a window. Blow up a balloon. Life/death. It's just a breath away. ~Susan Hunt
Thank you, Syd, for being one of the good ones. And for all of the words and good thoughts you gave to Kathleen. That meant a lot.
ReplyDeleteI had an uncle, long since gone, that was a horse person. He told me once that a man cannot find peace without a horse and a dog. I don't know if that is true but maybe one day Syd you can explain it so that I can understand.
ReplyDeleteI began reading Kathleen's post and for right now I cannot finish it. My sister-in-law is battling breast cancer right now and she just got her 4th chemo treatment yesterday. This is her second time, she did this before 9 years ago for the same thing. Not sure I am so positive this time.
I will come back to it in time.
Syd, I return to your blog because, as Ms. Moon commented, you are one of the good ones. Your descriptions of your animals, boat, home as well as the honesty with which you share your thoughts, makes me feel there is refuge and peace in the world. You have created that in your life consciously, and that is an example to all of us.
ReplyDeleteGreat words from Susan, worth noting. My condolences to all who knew Kathleen.
ReplyDeleteI also struggle, really struggle with this time of the year, the (to me) forced festivity and expectation to be happy. Can't do this. Can't.
it is hard to fathom the dysfunction of the world....to understand why people do what they do...kill as they kill...it is a hard time of year for many a people...holiday always are...we have to find the small joys...and realize too that we can not save everyone...
ReplyDeleteYou put into words a lot of what I feel these days watching the news and people being terrible to one another. You're right that good will towards others should not be relegated to just one day of the year.
ReplyDeleteBoth Kathleen and Ms Moon's posts moved me to tears. Syd, your horse sounds so wonderful a companion.
ReplyDeleteA beautiful animal owned and loved by a beautiful man !
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