Time has slipped away from me once again in a string of days. I am having the time of my life. Not being in a demanding job has freed me up in a lot of ways. I'm no longer scheduled in my life. Blogging used to be on a schedule of a daily write. I don't feel the need to do that anymore. And I don't feel guilty. Well....maybe a little because I wonder what each of you is doing and if you are okay.
My hobbies of sailing and riding and working out at the gym keep me physically fit and sane. My service in Al-Anon keeps me spiritually fit in a compassionate and humble way. And I have the usual life stuff to do like car maintenance, yard work, gardening, house chores--I hate calling them honey do's because I live here and share the house with an amazing person so I am glad to do my part in our partnership.
I love everything I do, but I also need time to not do anything and just be. The boat is my best escape for that. No people around--just me, the waves and the wind. If I don't get that time to myself, then I can feel the gypsy soul take over. I need the recharge time to be the free spirit that I now embrace.
Having been a driven scientist for decades, I hardly know that person now. Who was that guy? He thought that what he was working on was the most important thing. He had to publish a certain number of papers every year and get multiple grants. He had to do a lot of administrative BS that felt like sheer drudgery. He sat in an office overlooking a beautiful harbor and hardly ever looked out the window. Most every day, he was tied to the computer, analyzing data and writing. It was hard to shake off the harness and simply be free. Add to that the stress of living with an alcoholic, and life was not a lot of fun.
I now take time to breathe. I have space in my life now. I make the space and the time to do what I feel is good for my mental and spiritual health. I don't know how long I will have the stamina to keep sailing, riding, and cross train. I am hoping that I have at least 20 good years left. But I don't know about any of that. I just have this day that's ahead of me. And it seems good and filled with promise.
I hope that you have some breathing room in your life. Some time to just be and refuel your purpose and your spirit.
Beautiful post, Syd.
ReplyDeleteI try to do that- take time to renew my soul. For me that generally involves being alone, being outside. Not always. It's a balance. I am just so glad to know you are doing well.
Years ago I heard a nun give her AA talk. In it she said "I was always a person who could "do" ...I never had peace until I learned how to "be". I have never forgotten that and use it in my life. I'm happy for you that you have this time of peace in your life, Syd.
ReplyDeleteI love the sentence about Alanon keeping you spiritually fit in a compassionate and humble way. Isn't that so true? I am currently working so hard to have some time to just be. lol An oxymoron....but sadly very accurate. My fancy scientist friend..... I am so happy for you and for the life you have created for yourself and your lovely C.
ReplyDeleteBeing a human (just) being is something we have to learn to do. I'm glad you've found the ability and made space for it in your life.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful post and beautiful pictures.
ReplyDeleteI have all the breathing space I need Syd, Too bad though the air 'round here is so polluted and the body doesn't allow for enjoyable travel. *meh* I was a fortunate soul I did so much moving in my youth before all the damage caught up to me, alas though memories are not quite the same as looking forward to a new day. congratulations to you and C though--and as a betting man, I will bet you contributed to earth sciences and understanding of the oceans more than you give yourself credit for.
ReplyDeleteAh, so good to read this. And your comments are always appreciated, Syd.
ReplyDeleteIt's good to see some of my blogger friends are still out there, still blogging away and doing well in life :) lovely photos on this post btw.
ReplyDeleteit is def nice to not be restrained to a schedule and to be able to pace your life as you will...i hope to one day find myself somewhere along those same lines...smiles.
ReplyDeleteHello there. i have given up on alcohol and cigarettes.
ReplyDeleteid like to share my story on how i did it,
https://writingfluid.wordpress.com/2015/03/19/why-i-gave-up-on-intoxications/
My Friend we all gotta do what we need to do for ourselves,I hang out a lot of Face Book now I have a few vereran groups I belong to and some fun Music groups. Life is good.Peace be with you and C.
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