Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Just Do It

I was so tired last night that I didn't go to the 8 PM Al-Anon meeting but opted to go to bed. I generally meet with two sponsees starting at 6 PM until meeting time. Since I hadn't heard from either of them, I decided to just go home.

The one fellow hasn't contacted me since last Friday. I called him on Monday evening but haven't heard anything. The other sponsee called last night and said that he was avoiding having to work on the written part of Step One that looks at past and present behavior. My thoughts are that avoiding the work just prolongs the pain. So I told him to think about the Nike commercial that says, "Just Do It".

Going back over past events in relation to alcohol can be painful. But I found that if I didn't look at my past and current reactions to the alcoholic, I would be repeating those behaviors without changing. Yesterday's reading in Courage to Change pretty much sums up why it's important to look back at my past:
"There can be great value in examining the past. It can offer information about the present, as well as clues that might help us make changes for a better future......

Still, it is important to remember that the past is over. We are powerless over what has gone before. Although we can take steps to make amends, we cannot change the fact that we have harmed others. And we cannot change the fact that others have harmed us. We have only the power to change this present day."


  1. i like your thinking. since i've written my letter to my young self, with all the regrets and hurts, it IS a lot easier to let go of the past. and also to identify past wrong behaviours when i'm doing them. and recognising them puts the power back into my hands to change them. thank you!

  2. Thank you for this Syd. I especially like the part regarding we cannot change the fact that we have hurt and been hurt.

  3. I do see tremendous value in examining the past and in sharing it as well because when I share it either with my sponser or my therapist I end up finding out that my experiences and feelings about them are very common. I am not unique and my reactions are normal (well, normal for an alcoholic). It helps not to be alone in this fight.

  4. Isn't Courage to Change a great daily reader?

  5. so fun! I gave that "JUST DO IT" as a word to a sponsee a few years ago for her Alanon birthday. The good news is--she did!

  6. Written part of Step One, I didnt do a written part, am I missing something.
    Just Do It, yes thats a great saying, why beat yourself up thinking of excuses and stuff, just do it.
    Re my car, I guess I could of got away with 7% petrol in my diesel but the car being in effect a hire car for my dad my consiounce would kill me.

  7. I have recently started working with my sponsor. Her advice to me is to get a notebook and start writing- about the past, feelings, what's bothering you today. I bought the notebook (High School Musical with Zac Efron on the cover for a little levity) but have not written one thing down. I told her I'm not ready and she told me it will come. Problem is, I may never be ready. Thanks for this post today. If I "Just Do It" and get started, I think I'll be ok. It's just the getting started that is tough for me. I guess that's why it took me so long to get into recovery.
    I really enjoy your blog. Thank you so much for sharing your experiences.

  8. I am a little lost but I guess I am too much of a newbie. I have only been to two meetings so far. There are step meetings and regular meetings in my town. I attend the step meeting but haven't been aware of any writing assignments. I guess I need to buckle down and buy a step book to get started at home. I appreciate your posts and the Alanon info you pass along to others.


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