I listened to a speaker at a meeting yesterday who touched my heart. I am convinced that God was speaking through him. I've heard speakers before who have spoken convincingly but somehow what they said seemed to be ego driven. Instead what I heard from this fellow was purely spiritual and so inspiring.
I know that I have a power to accomplish things in life but having spiritual power isn't about accomplishing something or using force of will. Instead it's about surrendering my will. I have to work on my spiritual power because there are times when I still think that I can work at living by my sheer energy and force of ego.
I have read that spiritual power means that I have come to the realization that the visible world is part of a much greater spiritual world. Having spiritual power means that I see God in each person and thing, that I feel compassion and caring for others, and I do my best to live by God's will and not mine.
I think the practice of the Twelve Steps enabled me to see that all I had to do was to let the God of my understanding into my life. And by doing that my Higher Power showed me that I didn't have to stay miserable. I could begin to truly set my mind and spirit free.
I don't remember the moment when this occurred. It wasn't a specific epiphany but it was a gradual process in which my thinking began to change. I began to let go of judgment, selfishness, guilt, and even my fears have lessened since being in Al-Anon. I have heard that EGO means edging God out. That was what I used to do. I still want to tell God my will for him and what to do to carry it out, but that means of thinking fails me miserably.
And what I heard from the fellow speaking yesterday was that he had the spiritual power. It made an extraordinary difference in his life. He spoke of learning about love and giving love to others. And because of the spiritual power that seemed to be in his life, he had freedom from fear, love and tolerance of others, and could respond to life without self-pity. He spoke of service to others in which he received much more than he ever gave.
I have seen this over time with my sponsees. I see them struggle and I put out a hand to steady them. But it is God who has His hand on me.
"It is God who has His hand on me." yes. wonderful.
ReplyDeleteI heard early on in recovery that if my day spun out of control on my self-will, I could restart the day at any time by asking, "Thy will be done in and through me today." I can tap into the power greater than myself to recharge and regroup any time I want and need to, especially when I think by force of my own will I can change things. Have a blessed Sunday, Syd.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad God has his hand in.
ReplyDeleteBlessings and aloha...
So true. Whenever I start to pat myself on the back for a job well done (running a meeting, etc.), I quickly remind myself that all gifts and talents I have were given to me by God. ~Tracey~
ReplyDelete"having spiritual power isn't about accomplishing something or using force of will. Instead it's about surrendering my will..." These are words I can relate to.. I so badly need to practice turning over my own will to His will. It's all part of learning to let go, and this part, of turning over my own will, is probably one of the hardest lessons. The power struggle inside me wants to hold on to my own feeling of self-control. Not an easy process, but I know that through the passage of time and healing, I will gently learn to lean on my HP more, and to trust that His will is best for my life. I enjoyed your post today, as I usually do... enjoy your Sunday, or what's left of it :)
ReplyDeleteI needed to hear this. Thanks for sharing and reminding us :)
ReplyDeleteAlAnon IS a gradual process. I'm starting to feel that life is really different, and I have a loving God that I can trust. It's been subtle, and I had to do my part, but it does happen. I wish more people would stick around to feel it.
ReplyDeleteYou have done a fantastic job of describing the change.
Many times when speaking with a sponsee or anyone, I am very aware of the presence of a third and powerful presence - God.
ReplyDeleteWhen this happens, I can trust what I am saying because I know that God is in charge, not me.
PG
Right now I am inquiring of God about "power" and I am seeking to embody the kind of power that only comes from God, the kind of power I have read about, sometimes experienced but mostly observed in others. The kind of power that you can feel moving in you. I know this type of spiritual power must come with a heavy responsibility and I just asked today within myself. Do you really think you want this? Do you really think you could handle this? I'm not sure, but I certainly know there must be something extraordinary about it.
ReplyDeleteThis is the second experience I've had just today that has mentioned SURRENDER in one form or the other. I have recently been inclined to notice how much I RESIST life and day to day things. I recognize this resistance is coming from a dis-respect for the spiritual possibilities in day to day life. I am finally getting that for myself now.
I also believe it has been in part an element of fear. I want to be BRAVE & FULL OF COURAGE. I've realized that I need QUIET PRAYER/MEDITATION time and that is the only way to FINE TUNE my understanding and to move into a power greater than my "self".
I'm also intrigued by the simple ways we are used and the POWER of this use one person to the next. It really is beautiful.
My work is reflected in how I view others, you must be at some peace to see this in others.
ReplyDeletePeace begins within each of us. It is a process of repeatedly showing mercy to ourselves, forgiving ourselves, befriending ourselves, accepting ourselves, and loving ourselves. As we learn to appreciate ourselves and accept God's gift of peace, we begin to radiate peace and love to others.
well yes there can be a LOT of ego in recovery, so absence of it is palpable and refreshing.
ReplyDeleteyou get whatever type of recovery you aim for. if you want a strng recovery that is free from the neurotic presence of ego, then that is what you will get if you set your mind to it.
when i see anybody that interests me in this way, I look closely at what they are doing. How often do they speak to newcomers, how many have they sponsored, do they meditate? etc.
i have often found that people who do lots of newcomer work get the best recoveries. wel the kind that appeal to me the most anyway. 'i want what they have' if you like..
I just found this yesterday and i love it. not 100%, but I can relate a lot to this woman. she is helping, but not in a gooey way. no mush. just conveying the information that assists others. I realy like this approach, so this is my newest inspiration :)
http://onewomansthoughts.posterous.com/be-your-own-therapist-an-absolutely-incredibl
it is a gradual process, yet when we finally realise it, then it is a complete wow moment...
ReplyDeleteThat unmistakeable speaking in authenticity. I hand things over and then snatch them back. It bewilders me that the Divine is so unknowable and yet so close.
ReplyDeleteThat's the chain of command.
ReplyDeleteI have encountered maybe a few people that you speak of Syd,it's hard to explain unless you feel it yourself. This woman told me, anyone can pray, anyone can say, yes I believe, but DO you really Believe, she told me you have to open your heart totally, allow the Lord to enter, and I must know that faith in oneself is the greatest healing power of any kind. just believe , truly believe.
ReplyDeleteHow you speak of how you felt when this fellow spoke was purely spiritual, that is how I feel when I come here.
Thanks
I so love this post Syd, you have eloquently captured the essence of letting go and letting God.
ReplyDeleteI turn my day and life over as I can and as I notice, so that I can tap into the power of God...it is much better than the will of Gabi any day of the week!
Thank you...
g
I love how GOD speaks through us, and even more, I love it when we pay attention and catch it, and feel it fully! happy Monday Syd!
ReplyDeleteThis is a lovely post, Syd. Thank you.
ReplyDelete