Friday, November 26, 2010

Wedding anniversary

Today is our anniversary.  It amazes me that we have gone against the odds and are still together.  I don't think that our friends in graduate school thought that we would last.  I realize that there was ample evidence for what they thought.  And yet, here we are, so many years later. 

We aren't the same people as we were back then.  I believe that we have learned from each other over the years.  There is more respect and understanding for each other, more acceptance of who we are in the marriage, and more confidence that our lives are intertwined for a reason.

To say that being in recovery has made a big difference in the last four and a half years is an understatement.  I wanted fervently for C. to get help for many years.  I knew that she had a problem with alcohol.  What I didn't realize was that I had a problem too.  Alcoholism had made me into an angry, ungrateful, demanding, unhappy person.  I not only didn't love my wife, I didn't love myself either. Nor does it seem that I loved anyone else.  

Recovery was the fork in the road for us.  Thankfully, we took the road that has lead us to where we are today.  We have forgiven the past.  We understand that today is what we have.  We ask to do God's will.  And understand that regardless of the mistakes made,  we still love each other. 

We don't know how long our journey will be, but we know we'll be together to the end and this makes the bad times more bearable, and the good times even better.

28 comments:

  1. Wishing you a sweet, sweet celebration and many, many more well-deserved good years.

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  2. Congratulations, Syd and C. I have just started the process of the recovery, and this gives me great hope.

    All the best,
    Monica

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  3. My thoughts:

    A GIANT SMILE; A WARM HUG OF CONGRATULATIONS; AND MUCH GRATITUDE FOR THE SHARE OF SUCH
    JOY!

    HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TO YOU BOTH!

    LOVE AND HUGS,

    ANONYMOUS #1

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  4. Happy anniversary to you and your wife....I hope it's a wonderful day for the two of you.

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  5. Happy Anniversary!

    Glad you survived the odds!

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  6. Happy Anniversary! I admire couples who work on their marriage and still, after all those years, love each other. Thanks for the example that all the work works.

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  7. Happy anniversary to you both.

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  8. Happy Anniversary Syd. I don't know if I will ever get married again but I do prefer to share my life with someone in recovery.

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  9. Recovery does make for the best anniversaries, huh?

    I mean, compared to the alternative.

    Congrats to you both!

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  10. Happy Wedding Anniversary.
    awards/treats 4 u



    Blessings fly your way,
    Smiles.

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  11. Congratulatons sweet Syd and C. You two have been through a lot and I know you will have many more years together.

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  12. Happy Anniversary! She's a lucky gal and I'm sure, vice versa!

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  13. What a nice tribute to the miracles that happen when we make those hard choices. I think "weathering the storms" is a good analogy for you and C. Happy Anniversary and many many many more.

    ♥namaste♥

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  14. awww Happy Anniversary.
    No small feat and you have both travelled a long way in your respective recoveries.

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  15. Yeah,three hip checks to you and your sweetie . . xo

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  16. Hope your anniversary was joyous for you both. Remembering the hard times as well as the good times helps to embrace the now times, doesn't it?
    James and I send our best wishes on your anniversary and on your continued growth as a couple.

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  17. Happy anniversary, Syd. The test of true love is the understanding that real love chooses to continue to love. I am writing with a huge smile on my face. May God bless you and your very lucky wife with many decades of love.

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  18. How wonderful that you have gone (and are going) through recovery together. Another miracle of the Al-anon and AA programs.

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  19. Congratulations Syd and Mrs. Syd :) I look forward to reading a similar post again next year.

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  20. Happy Anniversary Syd and C! I hope you had a beautiful day!

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  21. Happy Anniversary and congratulations!
    Your shares have helped me get through some tough moments,
    I am glad you are in the program.
    Hope you had a nice peace filled day.

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  22. congratulations on your anniversary! I wish you many, many more happy years together!

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  23. Congratulations! I am so very glad, as your friend, that you have such a solid loving relationship. I wish you many more happy years together.

    Love,

    SB

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  24. Your survival as a married couple is a testament to the power of living the 12 steps. They create order out chaos, responsibility out of selfishness, gratitude out of blaming, and strength out of brokenness. I love being in a room of Alcoholics Anonymous with my husband, sharing how recovery has changed us and offering hope to others who struggle. That's what you and C. do: You offer hope that a Higher Power can heal long-standing wounds and create joy for two imperfect people.

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  25. P.S. What a glorious photo! Is this where you live? It makes me happy just looking at it.

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