Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Loving you

“The minute I heard my first love story,
I started looking for you, not knowing
how blind that was.
Lovers don't finally meet somewhere.
They're in each other all along.” ~ Rumi

This is a day for the romantics.  I'm one of those. Last night, I was in the card store,  and there were about a dozen of us looking at cards.  Some picked a card right away. Others, like me, were looking for something that resonated, something that captured a feeling.  I remember the little Valentine cards from elementary school.  I still have some of them that were saved.  They are precious reminders that someone took the time to say something nice to another.

It's a sad fact that this day is filled with unfulfilled expectations.  Nothing sends the message "You are nothing if you are not part of a couple" quite like all the commercialism surrounding Valentines Day.  Many out there will feel more alone and unloved than ever because there is no one "special" in their life.  I like to think that every day is a chance to love and be loved.  It isn't about today because much of this is just hype.  It's about changing my mind to be loving and to act on that.

No matter who you are,  you are worthy of being loved.  I realize that every moment I may not feel lovable, but I know that those are just passing feelings.  And they are a replay of the old tapes of the past.  I also don't have to go out seeking love.  I can just be who I am, offer up a smile, a wave, a nod to others. Amazing how that can chase the negative thinking away.

To reject that message of feeling unloved, I can turn it into thinking about what I can do to brighten someone else's day.   One of the things that we did together today was to exchange our cards, tell each other of our love, have a nice brunch, and go visit the FIL.  I also helped make some cookies for the meeting tonight.  The ladies like it when I bring them cookies.  And the hugs and smiles are nice to receive.  Maybe I will pick up a pack of those juvenile cards and give each of the members one of them.  I'm okay with being silly.

Today, is a really good excuse to remember the practice of letting the people in my life know that they are special to me.  It helps me to be positive and not to think about what I might be missing, but to think of who I have in my life that I love.

So on this day,  I am celebrating the love that is within me and has been there all along.  I don't need a special day to remind others that I love them.  I can do that every day. We have this habit of telling each other several times a day "I love you." One never knows what can happen.  As Joan Didion wrote: "Life changes in the instant. The ordinary instant." I don't go to bed angry anymore.  She is the love of my life.  I am grateful that we had a chance to keep loving each other.  That is the miracle of today.


  1. Love is in the air... and in the hearts of all mankind, I hope. Happy Valentine's Day, Syd.

  2. Happy Valentine's Dat Std. That was a good post. It helped to not let me feel as lonely on this day. It's been a tough year.

  3. we are resonating a bit today syd...i dont need anything external to remind me...or even a gift on a day when that is the expectation...

  4. You are so cool Syd.I love your posts and this one is so sweet. Kris B

  5. Amen on a very, very fine Valentine's Day sermon. Uh-huh.

  6. "...I am grateful that we had a chance to keep loving each other. That is the miracle of today."--Syd

    What wonderful gifts we have received--our programs, and the people who put up with us.


  7. Celebrating the love within me..
    like what you said.
    My caretaking of others was how I took care of myself.
    They just never gave love to me like I wanted...
    The more I learn to love and take care of myself the better able I can love those around me..
    Alanon helps me with tools

  8. Love this post, Syd.

    Valentine's Day is for amateurs!

  9. Beautiful message, Syd....love is a gift, meant to be shared :) and not just on Valentine's Day, but everyday! God bless you and your sweetheart & the amazing love that you share....

  10. Sweet.

    I forgot it was Valentine's Day. =(

  11. my wife, son and I share a simple, loving Valentine's Day... a few small tokens and a nice dinner out (or carried in)

  12. Love this post! I agree completely that each day should be a day of sharing our love for those around us. But like what you shared to use the holiday to help shift our thinking if it has gone array.

  13. Syd I really loved this post, hits home for me and my love as well. Everyday should be valentines for the truely in love and comitted.


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