Saturday, September 15, 2007

Attraction not promotion

I was listening to a pod cast on the steps in which there was a discussion of making amends to others who have done harm to us. Basically, the speaker said that we can forgive and accept others who have harmed us because they are sick in their soul. They have their issues too and in many cases they are living their life without the benefit of spirituality.

I think that has been a key to my letting go of the past: accepting that the harms that I did and that were done to me were because we were all shooting in the dark. I find that more and more I'm accepting of what others do. I find that I can let things go that used to bug me. I can shrug off the crazy comments that someone will make. I no longer have to buy into anyone else's stuff. They may be offering it for free but I don't have to own it.

That's the great thing about this program of recovery. I can accept that someone will have different ideas from me. I don't need to convince anyone of how they need to live or think. And as far as Al-Anon goes, I don't have to promote the program. I believe that living the program is promotion enough. This does more to carry the message than trying to force it on others. If people want what I have, then they can come to a meeting.

"When the student is ready, the treacher appears" Zen Buddhist saying.


  1. Syd,
    It is great to have a program where we can be the best person we can be.That in itself is the attraction.

  2. Watch out for this Micky guy. He left 4 comments as long as this one on 3 different posts of mine. He believes the 12 step programs are cults, & of satan. This man is one sick soul! He makes a nuisance of himself. I had to tell him not to come to my blog again. You do what you feel is right for you, of course.

    I love that, 'when the student is ready, the teacher appears'. I have found that to be true again & again. We are teachers, & students to each other. Attraction, not promotion, is one of the things I love about AA. Well said.

  3. I shall adopt your first paragraph.
    Don't you just love micky?

  4. i'm still too easily affected by what other's do and say. the past i've managed to deal with, but the everyday things i hear and are said still have the ability to bugger up my state of the mind on the day... practice, practice, practice... whew!

  5. I pray all the time for acceptance of others. It does not come easily for me. I think that my saving grace is that I continue to pray about it every single day. I'm will to take the action, and I know that is all that is required of me. So one day, I have full belief in the fact that God will remove this defect of character. God is old and slow ;) Lucky for me that I TRUST the process.

  6. I need your help.

    I’m working on a project for a nonprofit organization that provides support to families and friends of people with drinking problems. If there is, or has been a problem drinker in your life, it would help me a lot to know how this makes or made you feel.

    The survey is anonymous. No one will contact you as a result of your participation. You do not need to live in the United States to take part in the survey.

    If you know of someone who has a problem drinker in their life, I would be very grateful if you will pass this link along to them.

    Thanks for your help.


    Christopher Bonney
    Bonney & Company


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