I was listening to a pod cast on the steps in which there was a discussion of making amends to others who have done harm to us. Basically, the speaker said that we can forgive and accept others who have harmed us because they are sick in their soul. They have their issues too and in many cases they are living their life without the benefit of spirituality.
I think that has been a key to my letting go of the past: accepting that the harms that I did and that were done to me were because we were all shooting in the dark. I find that more and more I'm accepting of what others do. I find that I can let things go that used to bug me. I can shrug off the crazy comments that someone will make. I no longer have to buy into anyone else's stuff. They may be offering it for free but I don't have to own it.
That's the great thing about this program of recovery. I can accept that someone will have different ideas from me. I don't need to convince anyone of how they need to live or think. And as far as Al-Anon goes, I don't have to promote the program. I believe that living the program is promotion enough. This does more to carry the message than trying to force it on others. If people want what I have, then they can come to a meeting.
"When the student is ready, the treacher appears" Zen Buddhist saying.