Monday, March 3, 2008

Fake it Til You Make It

I have heard the expression "Fake It Til You Make It" at several meetings. I never really understood how it would help me. I've never been comfortable with the "faking it" part, although I have done it a lot during my life.

I think that it's better to just walk the walk and work the program, keeping honesty in mind, rather than having the "liar" alarm go off in my head.

Nonetheless, I felt like a fake at a meeting on Friday. I didn't want to go to the meeting, instead I wanted to go home, make it an early evening, and get some rest. But I went to the meeting, and generally felt restless and uninspired. The topic was Let Go and Let God. I shared but knew that I wasn't really letting go of much inside of me. My sharing felt like I was "faking it".

I've learned that there's no magic formula to get out of a bad place or to get past the low points that sometimes come along. Doing a quick inventory made me realize that I was feeling sorry for myself and letting my thinking get the best of me. I called my sponsor and talked about the fake feeling I was having. It was important for me to realize that I'm not always going to feel great. And that the times that I feel down because I'm not getting what I want can be an opportunity for me to remember that there's a purpose to life's events. And no matter what happens, good or bad, I can learn to laugh more and to cry less.

So here are some
things that help me to get past those moments of dis-ease:
1. Recognize resentments and take an inventory
2. Let go of worries and fears.
3. Live and let live
4. Give more
5. Expect less

I can't go back and make a brand new start to the day, but I can start from now and make a brand new ending to the day.


  1. I feel a lot fear before meetings at times - especially when I'm just not doing well or having a bad day. and I don't want to face others - show anyone how I'm REALLY doing. i'd rather go hide by myself.

    i also TRY not to feel guilt if I decide to take care of myself and go "rest" instead of making a meeting. sometimes not clear on which is the better choice - go and "fake it" or don't go and wonder - would that have helped me or someone else? yada yada

    all a balancing act of sorts i suppose.

  2. Speaking as a recovering alcoholic who is doing my best at dealing with situations that I've never dealt with, I "fake it" often.

  3. Give more, expect less...that is one of the keys to my happiness

  4. GREAT post. Okay if i use it in my carnival of all substances?

  5. '...a brand new ending...' what a worthwhile concept to engrave in my mind, thanks!

  6. great list! Sometimes, I just need a list....ya know?


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