Friday, October 10, 2008
Molls wrote a comment on one of my recent posts that what I write seems sad. I guess that my posts may seem sad because the situations that I write about depict the pain of people, including me, who have been affected by someone else's alcoholism.
I'm not by nature a sad person but a thoughtful one. That can translate to "serious". Maybe it's a manifestation of my disease that seriousness and thoughtfulness come through as sadness. I do have a lot of compassion for people who come to meetings and are in so much pain. I know that pain because I lived it and still live some moments of it through my character defects.
Yet, I can be as goofy as anyone. And there are times when I sit down at the computer and think about nothing that's serious. It's as if my mind has blanked out the heavy stuff. I want to write about the boat or my new camera or any of a dozen things that have nothing to do with alcoholism. There are those days when I need a break from the disease and all the thoughts that go with it.
So in keeping with feeling happy, I'm going to tell you about a present that my wife bought me. Some of you know that I like photography. I dabble in it quite a bit and hope to do more when I have free time. Anyway, I've been using one of Nikon's first digital SLR cameras, the venerable D70 since it came out. Yesterday, I came home to see a box sitting on the table in the kitchen. It was a Nikon D90 with two new lenses. What a surprise!
Of course, I asked "What is this?", knowing full well what it was. She said, "Oh, it's that Nikon that you've been drooling over." Ha--she knows me well and knows what I drool over. And there was just a little bit of the thought that "I don't deserve this" going through my head. I think that I even stammered that this was an unbelievably nice gift. But I decided that even though I might not feel that I deserved it, I really was happy with the gift. Well, it took me about 2 hours to unwrap and study every piece in the box. And it will take me another day or two to mess with the settings and read over the manual.
So I'm happy as a crab in pluff mud with this new toy. And grateful for the caring of my wife who never ceases to amaze me. How's that for some happy stuff?