Saturday, November 21, 2009

Laws

THis must have been written by a pessimist, but it is so true...



1. Law of Mechanical Repair - After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee.

2.
Law of Gravity - Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

3.
Law of Probability -The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

4.
Law of Random Numbers - If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal and someone always answers.

5.
Law of the Alibi - If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.

6.
Variation Law - If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now (works every time).

7.
Law of the Bath - When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.

8.
Law of Close Encounters -The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

9.
Law of the Result - When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.

10.
Law of Biomechanics - The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

11.
Law of the Theater - At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.

12.
The Starbucks Law - As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

13.
Murphy's Law of Lockers - If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

14.
Law of Physical Surfaces - The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug.

15.
Law of Logical Argument - Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.

16.
Brown's Law of Physical Appearance - If the clothes fit, they're ugly.

17.
Oliver's Law of Public Speaking - A closed mouth gathers no feet.

18.
Wilson's Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy - As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.

19.
Doctors' Law - If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there you'll feel better. Don't make an appointment and you'll stay sick.

13 comments:

  1. THat is the most interesting reading I've had on a Saturday morning in some time. The hubs and I enjoyed the read. Thanks. Tammy

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  2. Yeppers...

    Blessings and aloha...

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  3. Thanks for a good chuckle for my morning coffee.

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  4. The whole time I read this I was thinking about making a Dr's appt. and then it turned out to be #19.
    Fun list !

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  5. LOL!!! These are all funny and some are SO TRUE! I hope you don't mind, I am going to link back here today from WFIO.

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  6. I find many of them to be so accurate and likewise have applied to life situations in the past year. Very cool! LOL

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  7. pessimist, maybe, but still so very true...

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  8. lol that's the other "How it Works" lol

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  9. Loved these! The first one works in correlation to being a printer. I don't know how many times I suddenly had hair in my eyes, my nose itched or something. I never went home without a trace of ink somewhere on my face. (Hugs)Indigo

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Let me know what you think. I like reading what you have to say.