Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Starting a new group

Today we had the organizing meeting for a new Al-Anon group. I am fortunate to be a part of this process as I had not done this before. The format for meetings is pretty much the same from group to group so that no matter where you go in the world, a person will know it is an Al-Anon meeting.  It's the details though that more or less set the tone for the group.

One of the first things we had to do was decide on a name.  A friend in AA said that the name could set the tone for the group.  He was in the start up AA group High Noon and realized in retrospect that the name wasn't a good one. It invited those other than AA to come in and the meeting has become watered down AA.  So the name was something that seemed to be important.  I like the name for this new group, Primary Purpose, which was decided at the meeting. It is in keeping with the statement that the primary purpose is to help families and friends of alcoholics. It hopefully connotes what we are about. 

The type of meetings seems to be important as well.  We discussed what we wanted to hear.  Having a topic meeting such as Anger, Resentment, Gratitude, etc didn't seem to be what those present wanted. The group conscience decided that we wanted something more focused.  We decided to have a step, a tradition/concept, and a literature meeting each month with the fourth meeting being on a topic with open discussion. I like this because the focus is on recovery and the path to reach solutions. I think this group will be hard-core Al-Anon. As one lady expressed, "I have been searching for a real Al-Anon meeting since I arrived.  It appears that this will be one." 

We also agreed to have a group conscience every three months to take the pulse of the group.  Changes can be made as the group evolves.  That is a good thing--keeping an open mind. 

I know that I learn something from each Al-Anon meeting I attend.  But I do appreciate the singleness of purpose of the fellowship. I don't want the message to be diluted.  And it appears that the message for the time being will be a good one.  If this isn't everyone's cup of tea, then there are many other meetings where one can get what they want.   It appears that there will be yet another opportunity to focus on Al-Anon recovery in this area.  I am grateful to be part of this fledgling group.

16 comments:

  1. Interesting. I think the structure of that meeting will really help convey the purpose of Al-Anon in a good, constant way. Sometimes I go to a the same meeting, week after week, and the topics are just so-so and I don't really get a good feel for the program as a whole.

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  2. nice. sounds like the group is off in the right direction...

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  3. ...and Topsy just GREW! That's the way it's done. Glad you are a part of the startups, they usually need a couple guiding hands.

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  4. It is a wonderful experience to be part of the beginning of a new group. Enjoy!

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  5. Good for you Syd. Starting a new meeting was an awesome learning and growing experience for me. Best of luck!

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  6. Love the sound of "hard-core Al-Anon!"

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  7. Beginning a new meeting is good work. I was blessed to have begun a meeting in my small little town over 6 years ago. It's still going strong, although it has changed formats a bit, and the cast of characters is different. People are still finding the solution there and that's what counts!

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  8. I hope you will find there is room for one more meeting in your area and when the word gets out people will find their way there.

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  9. Starting a meeting has been one of the most gratifying experience I have had. The meeting is going strong (without me, imagine that!). I have now returned to it and seeing new faces makes me smile. I should say that "we" started it as my sponsor was my cheerleader and helped to anchor the meetings. It was a "we" thing and "I" was a part. How great is that. Good luck, it sounds like it will be a place of healing and hope.

    ♥namaste♥

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  10. that is awesome!! our nar[anon group just won't step up to the plate, i tried to help get them involved in service work to get the word out, they just flaked out, and now they still whine that they are so small. you can lead a horse to water...

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  11. Nice. Sounds really good. I am also part of a very lively group, which tries to stick to the program. I am very grateful, but sometimes have the feeling that our group is too big (25-30 people). Is there an ideal group size in your (or Alanon's) view?

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  12. I'll bet you're famous in your area in the Al-Anon community, Syd. I'll be people ask themselves, "I wonder what Syd would think in this situation?"
    And I'm serious about that.

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  13. Sweet!

    Our AA group has been working a primary purpose format since it's inception, and we are trying to ensure, through regular group inventories, that it will be tweaked and continue to become stronger.

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  14. that is awesome, Syd. In just the last 2 weeks I have discovered that two of my neighbors are struggling with discovering their child's addiction. These homes are so close I could throw a rock from my front porch and hit theres! It makes me realize how many more must be out there needing support. God bless your new group.

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  15. Sounds fabulous. When (day and time) and where will this meeting be? Maybe someday I'll be in your neck of the woods and will want a 'solid' Al-Anon meeting. Sounds like this one will be just that.

    PG

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  16. how do I find a group like this? being new to a new group may be just what I am looking for. this way we grow from the beginning. it seems that finding a group where most the people click could be a hard find.

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Let me know what you think. I like reading what you have to say.