Our numbers at the home group have dwindled somewhat, but that is what has become so appealing to me. It is a small group where I feel very much like I can share about what is on my mind. I am glad to see these people and believe that they are glad to see me. It's a comfort to know that they are there. And the drive is wonderful, going over country roads and seeing the Lowcountry marshes sets my mind at ease and my heart singing. It is just like coming home.
Sadly, one of the members who accepted the GR position has been going through a very tough time lately. Her father is critically ill and is not expected to recover. She has basically shut herself off from the fellowship and from those who would like to help her. She is angry and feels very much alone. I am sorry that she feels this way. I know that we have made offers to help her in whatever way we can. I dropped off a casserole for her two weeks ago as she was wanting people to bring over food. I haven't heard from her since.
I know that I could keep calling her but that seems a lot like badgering her. I know that if she needs something, she has my phone number along with the numbers of every one else in the group. Seeing someone fade away before your eyes has to be an extremely difficult thing. I feel for her and hope that God gives her the strength to get through the whole ordeal. And hopefully, she will realize that she isn't really alone.
I know that should I have a crisis in my life, there are many people that I can call. They would be there for me to help out. I also realize that no one can solve these crises that occur in life for me. I have to work through them and walk through them. God will give me strength to get through somehow. Just as I hope that she will get some strength from the God of her understanding.
Bitterness and anguish is a high hard wall to climb and most people never realize it is a short course wall. One easily enough walked around rather than climbed over.
ReplyDeleteyeah i hope she realises it before its too late...i know people like this...
ReplyDeleteIsolating is just one more of those re-actions that I must be aware of before it sucks me in. It can be so easy to wrap myself up, alone, in a warm dark place. She will get through this..I hope she reaches out soon.
ReplyDelete♥namaste♥ (P.S. I am loving the pics!)
We are all different. Even in inclusive groups, caring groups, all are different.
ReplyDeleteMaybe a call to her would not be badgering. And so what if it was? Badger away. Once, at least.
That's what I think.
Your description of the drive to the meeting sounds like the country roads here. We have been enjoying small black squirrels in the yard here at the new place.
ReplyDeleteGrieving makes some folks turn away like wounded animals. Facing death is the most difficult thing of all to face, and in the end each of us does face it alone. And yet, we need to know someone cares. Call your friend and tell her you care, and that emotions are messy and you accept her messiness, her anger, her fear, her impending loss.
ReplyDeleteAnd if she hangs up the phone, get her a card and mail it to her, for her to open and hold onto and cry over and feel comforted by and for her to tear up if she wishes. She may be in denial that this is happening at all, and that if she talks about this, she maybe giving in to death. Oh so many time do we humans try to fight Death, bargain with it, and even guiltily welcome it.
There are times when I want one of my parents to die first, and my brother and I know exactly which one. And with those unspoken thoughts, comes guilt....
We are funny creatures this way... when we need people the most we will shut them out of our lives. I have been guilty of this but hopefully whatever she is going through that is making her do this will soften and she will reach out to those who can lighten the load....
ReplyDeletewhen people are in the midst of pain, all we can do is pray andhope they reach out. God willing, she will be back and thankfully have you and your fellows to help her back up. Thats what we do best!
ReplyDeleteI love home groups! I also am sad when people isolate or leave.
ReplyDeleteSometimes I have a selfishness that says, they're wrong. Sometimes I have heartbreak at friendship, pro-offered isn't accepted, sometimes I just forget them easily.
Mostly I'm just glad I experience a heart and enthusiasm that continues to compel me to return :)