Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Signs of spring
This has been a chilly winter, but I can't complain because there hasn't been piles of snow or blizzards or even a significant ice storm. Just windy and chilly. I am hoping that we at least have turned the corner on winter. My cold frames are filled with plants for spring. I am looking forward to getting into the garden and tilling up the raised beds, turning over the soil.
I am working on a couple of small grant proposals that deal with cleaning up waterways and recycling at marinas here. I see how many aluminum cans and bottles are thrown away at the marina where my boat is. Not a single recycling container in sight. I have talked to management about it but get the same tired answer--too much trouble, too much money. Anyway, it is worth a shot to write a grant to at least post signs that encourage people to remove their recycled materials and not throw them in with the other trash.
I went to my home group meeting last night. It was a step study on coming to believe that a power greater than myself could restore me to sanity. What a revelation it was for me to realize that there was a power greater than me. I thought that I had all the answers, could solve things through sheer will power and determination. It was a great relief to not have to try to solve the problems of others or to try to turn them into who I wanted them to be. I wonder sometimes why I didn't realize much earlier that by doing the same things over and over and expecting different results, I was getting no where. I was simply digging myself deeper into anxiety and despair (=insanity).
Ego is such a driver in so many ways. It plays tricks with me, making me think that all is well and that I am in control. So many times that has been proven to not be the case. Yet, today with the sun shining and the buds on the trees, I feel ready to meet the challenges of the day. I simply remind myself that I can only change the things that I can and accept that there is much beyond my control.