Radar school was postponed until February because there were not enough students to take the class. It's just as well because in view of the horrible events of yesterday, I don't think that I would be able to concentrate. I was saddened by the killings but realized that such occurrences seem to not be surprising which troubles me.
I tossed and turned last night thinking about loss of life, loss of hope and the pain we inflict in a seemingly nonstop way on each other. This morning I met a friend for breakfast, went to the boat, and decided that going to an oyster roast in the afternoon was the best cure for my sad blah feeling. I sat and talked to a couple of old drunks who were knocking back fireball shots. We ate oysters and talked about the benefits of seafood, being married, and having a good dog and a great boat. We did not mention what happened in Connecticut.
I felt better after eating a couple of full buckets of oysters. I am even looking forward to having recovery friends over for a Boxing Day open house. Maybe in the face of tragedy, it's better to put one foot in front of the other and keep trudging. Just keep doing the ordinary, seek out friends, eat some happy food, and don't dwell too much in your head. At least, that's what I'm telling myself.
I feel that this is now the time I need to start using my voice. Enough is enough. We have to do something as a nation to stop the senseless killing. There must be a way.
ReplyDeleteI signed a petition calling for a ban on assault weapons which used to be law. It is a small thing but there will be more to be done in the coming weeks.
DeleteI think we all are just kind of moving, going through the motions. I don't think human beings quite know what to do with such tragedy. I don't think we can allow ourselves to feel it fully....its just too much. Good for you for finding something to do to take your mind off of it all. I hope your parents-in-law find their way to their destination with much peace surrounding them and no drama or pain in whatever timing that is right for them.
ReplyDeleteI hope so too, Annette. It is sad that they are coming to the end of life. I hope for it to be over in a gentle way.
Deleteon facebook there is a discussion going on that troubles me,but maybe that might be a counter-measure to protect kids.in Isreal the teaches are trained armed to protect the school children. heave forbid we have to resort to the same thing.Yesterday a Memphis Tenn Police officer was gunned down as well.yesterday was not a good day for me.being a retired corrections officer,there are 2 things I hate,that is the death of a LEO(Law Enforcement Officer),and Children.
ReplyDeleteWatching our parents grow old it tough... I'm watching my Dad go down hill fairly quickly. Brings tears to my eyes, but I try to focus on living in the moment to help me enjoy the time I do have with him.
ReplyDeleteI feel the same way, one foot in front of the other and continue to focus on what is important. Live and Let Live. I also turn off the news. I will not help the media to glorify the man that killed those children and adults. I will not even acknowledge his name. However, I will make an effort to recognize the bravery and courage that came of the situation in the teachers and children. I will try to remember at least one of the victims names and honor the life they lived, no matter how short or long. I've also read today a way to help in this situation is to explore local or national efforts for mental health research and donate, instead of pointing to gun control as the problem. It's the people that need the help. Suppose I found a bit of my voice tonight. I hope you find your balance and serenity my friend.
I have to agree with Marcia. These shootings have been occurring with disturbing regularity for over 20 years (if not longer). And every time it happens, the event fades, people forget, no action is taken and then it happens again. I don't want to comfort myself right now because I don't want to forget how this actually feels and what this loss truly is. I will find at least one action, be it calling my Congress person or writing to the White House to make my thoughts known. That probably is not enough, but if everyone starts to make their elected officials responsible for their cow towing to groups like the NRA, maybe something will change. I'm beyond disgusted.
ReplyDeleteMonica
i think it is always good to be together with friends and talk out these things...esp in the face of tragedy....man, i am a bit envious of the oysters....mmm....bet they were pretty good...and hope all is well now with the MIL
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry to hear you're having a tough time Syd and I hope your parents-in-law get better soon. Those oysters look delicious!
ReplyDeleteFireball shots I never got a chance to down a few..
ReplyDeleteThey sound like a horrible hang over. I love oysters my favorite is the Kumamoto which we like in the Bay Area.
It must be hard on your wife to watch her parents decline.
Wishing you all happiness during the Holidays
Hi Syd,
ReplyDeleteI am alone during the day, and the news came over the internet about the massacre. I read and re-read all the alleged happenings pertaining to this tragedy, fighting back the tears. Then, a picture of a woman in obvious grieving agony - hoping that her sister, a teacher escaped. I do not know if she did or not. But the sight of her in tears, brought me to tears - uncontrollable emotions for about a half-hour. Thank God for Al-Anon; when tragedies happened years ago, I was told to acknowledge my pain for 20 minutes - then do just as you did - get another picture in your head and let it go. Step #1 is a good reminder of the powerlessness we have over news. I am grateful that many brave teachers were able to help to save the little ones. Meanwhile, the peace that the families need will come after the grief and anger subsides. Thanks for letting me say these things; my heart still aches at the thought of losing so many little children and their teachers.
I'm going to the kitchen now for some egg-nog and a brownie.
Hugs,
Anonymous #1
I agree, Syd. I believe that is a coping mechanism which can be very useful.
ReplyDeleteThe gradual decline of parents is hard, as there is usually no coming back. There may be a halt, for a short or long time, but no reversal. Your wife is having it harder than most, with both parents losing ground lately. Wishing her strength - and you, too, as you support her and also deal with your own sense of loss.
I have nothing to add here, Syd. Just...yes. We keep on. Somehow.
ReplyDeleteWise, sensible words that gave me some hope and made me feel just a little better.
ReplyDeleteSometimes all we can do is concentrate on our little corners of the world and try to make them better. I am quite certain you do that well.
ReplyDeleteI think your post is in tune with a lot of us these days.
ReplyDeleteWe do have to continue living as the world twists and turns.
Part of what keeps the world is safe is that front door opening
and us out and about living free.Nothing should stop that and our
friends and happy food certainly have a way of encouraging us to
put our shoes on :)
Sending the best to you and yours
from my little porch to yours..Tabxo
Syd...so sorry about your Inlaws. I know this weighs heavily on you and your wife's hearts.
ReplyDeleteMy dad is in assisted living - the staff tells me from November to January they see a decline in residents and this has been the case with my dad - two hospitalizations in the past month for dehydration because he won't eat or drink.
My heart and prayers out to all of you.
Dear Syd,
ReplyDeleteI hope that all of you find serenity, in whatever way works for each of you. I wish you peace.