Thursday, August 13, 2015

Nine years today

Today is my 9th anniversary in Al-Anon.  I have told you about all of these years right here. You probably know more about my life than anyone, except for my first sponsor and my wife.  I'm grateful that you have been with me on the journey thus far.

And it has been a good journey in recovery.  I can remember how it started out. That first year was confusing.  My wife was new to AA, and I wasn't sure whether our marriage could be healed.  We didn't trust each other.  It was a rough time.

Gradually, as each year passed, we came to realize that if we applied the principles of recovery to our lives, we could prevail.  I learned about compassion and just how much I loved her.  I realized that we were both damaged when we met.  And as I thought of her as a child, fearful of the emotional abuse from an alcoholic father and a mother who was affected by her husband's alcoholism, I came to feel so much love for her.  I realized that I was wounded too by my father's drinking.  And I came to love him more than ever, along with my in-laws, because they did the best they knew how to do.

So C. and I shared a common bond of children affected by alcoholism.  I knew her pain, and she knew mine.  We grew to be respectful and kind to each other, rather than having the old judgmental and contemptuous feelings.  And over these years our love has grown to where we are today.  Neither of us can imagine life without the other.

I am so fortunate to have found out who I am and that I have a lot of good qualities.  I am grateful for having met so many people whose paths I would not have crossed if not for Al-Anon.  I am glad that you have been along for the journey too.  We have written, learned, cried, laughed, and comforted each other in more ways than I thought possible. Thank you all.


17 comments:

  1. Your relationship, in some odd way, has been strengthened by your troubles, don't you think?
    I am so grateful for your voice in this world.
    Happy Al-Anon birthday! Proud of you. You stick to it, man. You do it right!

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  2. Glad you have stayed the course. I think the most meaningful marriages are founded on the foundation of recovery. You have been a great beacon for those who wonder whether to stay or to go. Glad you both found your way.

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  3. Your story is wonderfully inspiring. Even to those who do not have the complications of addiction in their lives. Thank you for writing from your heart.

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  4. Dear Syd,

    Happy, happy and more happy Al-A-versary!! What a lovely post, and such gratitude. It's so hopeful to see the miracle in action both in you and your marriage. You inspire me, and countless others who have been reading you all these years.

    Bravo! And please, do...keep coming back. :)

    Lots of love,
    Christina

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  5. This month is my 10 year anniversary in Alanon. You always seem so much more mature than me though! lol I love that you found a way to live a compassionate life through our rooms. I feel like I found that too and I am so grateful! We are so blessed that we found our way into our program. I believe that it saved my sanity... Some may question that, but it could be much worse! Of that I am sure. I am also so grateful that I found your blog so long ago and in some strange anonymous way, we have worked our programs together. :o) Happy 9th birthday my friend!

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  6. Congratulations on your anniversary, on your recovery, on still going the distance. Thank you for sharing here online -- your writing has helped and comforted me and I am sure many, many others. Wishing you both many, many more days, one day at a time.

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  7. What a journey it's been! Syd I remember reading back through the entries in your first year and hoping you and C would make it. And your posts have encouraged and inspired me so often. Congratulations on nine years of a new life --

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  8. Hi Syd: It's been a privilege and a joy to get to know you (and C) through your blog. Congratulations to you both. Fondly, Ginnie

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  9. Congratulations and great to see your stunning pictures :-)

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  10. Finding a way to live with cards you were dealt is a miracle in itself and finding someone to live and grow with is truely a double.win. Congrats. I remember when I first found you blog it comforted me and gave me hope. Thank you.

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  11. It's always so wonderful to hear about how your marriage has triumphed through Al-Anon and AA and all the work you've both put in. My marriage feels so much stronger as well, although my husband never did do Al-Anon. I'm so happy for you both and you've been shining examples of hope for me. So thank you for all you've shared.

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  12. No one ever said the road to contentment was an easy one but if asked i believe you would answer "yes I am content now." Congratulations for both of you in not giving up in the hurricane seas.

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  13. Happy Anniversary! Thank you for sharing your journey with us, both the ups and downs. What a blessing for you and C to walk that journey together and find peace together. You both give us all hope and courage that we can find peace within ourselves too! I'm grateful to have found your blog over four years ago and a fellow Al-Anon friend. :) Also want to thank you for being a huge inspiration to me in starting my own recovery blog four years ago. Loving life!

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  14. I guess I have known you since you started your blog. You have changed greatly in that time. I am glad to know you Syd.

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  15. Thanks Syd for your experience strength and hope being part of the Alanon community has helped me the realize I am not alone..this is a gift of tremendous healing and with this I am able to reach out to others suffering...
    One day at a time

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  16. I am Greatful for the both of your recoveries! Take Care and God Bless,you Both!

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  17. Thanks for sharing your story and insight. I am relatively new to Alanon, 2 years in November and have enjoyed reading your blog. I too would like to write about my experience in the incredible program one day, but for now I am enjoying reading about it.

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Let me know what you think. I like reading what you have to say.