I grew up in a small town in the Tidewater area of Virginia. It was a remarkable place at that time because there was a real community where everyone knew everyone else. When I was a kid that could be both a blessing and a curse. I wasn't allowed to get away with much in that town!
I still have an affinity for small towns. Many times when I drive, I try to go off the beaten path and travel the backroads. There are still fascinating places where every one still knows your family and where the old "dead" buildings are still allowed to stand. It's nice to see old buildings still standing. It seems that their "soul" is taken away when they are torn down. Once proud, they now stand as reminders of the town's past. I like the idea that they are still there.
My home town used to be like that. When I was a kid, the county never had a stop light. Although the heart of the village hasn't changed much, the surrounding area has changed tremendously. When I drive along the main highway leading to the village, I hardly recognize the way it used to be. It boasts a Super Walmart, and all the little Mom and Pop stores have closed up. I don't like what the mega stores have done to the landscape or the charm of the place. Now the uniqueness of the place has been degraded and it has been made the same as every other urbanized area. Open land that used to be wooded or farm fields has been replaced by more fast food joints, WalMarts, endless gas stations, and many empty strip malls. Nothing unique about that.
I used to take for granted the beauty of the countryside where I grew up. Now all I can see is how the developers have ruined the landscape. I remember a hill overlooking a hay field where I would go in high school when I wanted to be alone. It was a stunning place to sit and watch the sunset, throwing sunbeams on the golden hay. I would sit by the edge of the woods and look out over the rolling hay fields and feel such peace. When I was in college I went back to that same spot and looked out over a whole field of patio homes. Every one looked just like the other. It made me painfully realize that nothing remains the same, no matter how near perfect it is. Someone or something will come along to mess with it.
Life is just like that. Just when we have found something that is beautiful and moving, someone or something will likely try to mess it up. I'm grateful that Al-Anon helps me keep going during difficult situations where I have a potential to really mess things up. I'm finding more and more that my life feels altered but in a good way. I can still appreciate the beauty of life and all that it has to offer even during the most challenging of times. There is so much to learn and so much more growth to have.
This blog shouts out "recovery" to me.
ReplyDeleteI find it hard sometimes to realize that the saying, "you can't go back home" (or something like that) is really true.
Things change. I hate change....good or bad....but thank God for Al-Anon that has taught me how to live life which is always changing.
PG
I know Syd. I grew up in a small town that has gone the same way as your hometown. As a boy I could wander the creeks, rivers and woods where now the developers and big box stores have taken over.
ReplyDeletegoing back home...we have stoplights where there should never be one...lol. so much has changed...i resonate syd
ReplyDeleteI lived off concrete for 8 of my 50 odd years and your SUBurbanized descriptions make my skin crawl Syd. Wal-Mart or any other name retailer won't even open a store in Detroit. Not that i personally want one near me.
ReplyDeletePshaw we have more vacant land (an area equal to the size of Boston or SF)reverting to nature and the way it was before it got paved over> In a few more years I expect they'll start culling the deer herds in the city limits.
I've always liked the song "Small Town" by John Mellencamp. Your blog reminded me of the line "and I can dream in a small town"....
ReplyDeleteThis reminds me of Roseland and how all around the little village where I grew up it has mushroomed but in the tiny heart of it- it is much the same with the exception that the little shacks which were there fifty years ago look nicer now. Tidier. Restored and made lovelier.
ReplyDeleteNow THAT is a good progress.
And a metaphor for what change CAN be.
i went back to my 'little' home town in june, and lo and behold, its not a little town anymore. gone are the woods, the empty fields around the house i lived in. a sad realisation how everything is touched by growth and development.
ReplyDeleteWhen I was a child, my family would take long car trips. We would leave the highway in search of "local color." Now it is nothing but Wal-Marts and McDonald's. Hampton Inns and Holiday Inn Express. Every single place you go. So Sad.
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear about your town. Strip malls and Walmart suck.
ReplyDeleteLove,
SB
I agree so much with that syd, the council were going to build in the last bit of fields near our house, I wrote a letter to my MP at the time, thankfully it seems to hav blown over now that the government are skint and cutting back on everything.
ReplyDeleteStill compared to US the UK is tiny and crowded
wow Syd,
ReplyDeletethat was remarkable...
This read like a little bit of a historical map of your life journey my friend..I appreciate you sharing.
ReplyDeleteSometimes we need to look back to see where we are now and where to go next..and it's not always bad..and it's not always good..it's whatever we chose to perceive it as being based on what we need from it today.
You rule.As usual.xo
I was brought up in Glasgow (Scotland), Syd. It's a totally different place nowadays. What were once slums are now highly desirable luxury apartments.... we would find it difficult to be able to afford to live there now! :O)
ReplyDeleteThe same is happening here Syd, Asda (Walmart) and tesco have driven so many small shps out of business. The developers have built cookie cutter homes, densely packed. We think we live the dream, then one day as you have found we turn around and find that the past we had isn't there anymore and we see that we are the poorer for it.
ReplyDeleteI love your blog, Syd. I am fairly new to Alanon, and like you are "grateful that Al-Anon helps me keep going during difficult situations where I have a potential to really mess things up." I'm having one of those days today, and just reading those words has helped me. There's a real sweetness about your writing. Glad I found you.
ReplyDeleteI believe this is why I still have the affinity for those old books I still go back to when I'm not feeling well. They paint a portrait of a time and place like those towns. Where descriptions of nature and of characters well known are still available. Where I can still gain that beautiful beautiful feeling. It's capture in the pages of a favorite series or two from my childhood.
ReplyDeleteMy dad calls that going off the beaten path "taking the scenic route" and I have also found that I do that quite often, I run across some really beautiful spots on those jaunts.
This post especially speaks to me about inevitable change with some of my recent experiences in mind. Thank you. I could feel the serenity in this writing.
ReplyDelete